“The home should be to the children the most attractive place in the world, and its greatest attraction should be the mother's presence.” — The Ministry of Healing, 388.

I often wondered: How? How can one be a wife, mother, do laundry, cook, iron, work outside the home, study, etc.? – Impossible!! – you might say. Yes, it is possible... Or is it really?

I went through that terrible experience a few years ago. With two small children, attending college, plus household chores, managing the accounts for five daycare centers, working from 8 AM to 5 PM, and still serving in the church. What a difficult time! I had to adapt to various situations and learn to optimize my time. I want to emphasize that if I could go back, I would do everything very differently!

Today I still work outside the home, three times a week, at a much calmer pace, but ultimately, I don't believe it's ideal; I press on toward the goal...

“In many homes the wife and mother has no time to read and keep herself well-informed, nor to be a companion to her husband, or to be in touch with the developing minds of her children. There is no time for the precious Saviour to become an intimate and beloved companion. She gradually immerses herself solely in domestic toil, absorbing her strength, time, and interests in things that perish with use.” — The Ministry of Healing, 368, 369.

I'd like to share what I learned during that period, which helped me and continues to help me to this day to do my work quickly, so I can have time for my husband, children, and myself... lol

After much reading and prayer, I came to the conclusion that I needed to make some changes in my routine:

1. Prioritize what is most important. Seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness... At home, we always had morning and evening worship, but I realized that besides this family time, I needed a special moment with God. And this, rest assured, made all the difference in our lives. I started waking up early in the morning to talk to God and ask for wisdom to act in my home. And little by little, God showed me the changes that needed to be made in our family.

1. Create a plan – Establish a routine. The book I Will Be Ready for the Sabbath from CPB helped me a lot. Planning is essential. Dividing tasks by days of the week made the work easier. Our Creator didn't do everything in one day; we need to learn from Him.

1. Simplify – Reduce activities, slow down, even church activities. I remember I had to step down from leading the children's choir and other positions; it wasn't an easy decision, but I needed time for my family. Today, with them older, I serve in the church in roles where they can assist me.

1. Declutter – Do a "big clean-up" at home, really keeping only what is necessary. Large houses tend to accumulate many unnecessary things that take up our precious time; if necessary, move house... lol. After five moves in six years, I realized we don't need much to live. Here's a link for anyone who wants to start decluttering: http://blog.todosdecoram.com/2012/01/declutter-voce-ja-fez-10-dicas-para.html

1. Acquire furniture, equipment, and appliances to facilitate activities.

“Let your first objective be to make the home pleasant. Be careful to provide conditions that ease work and promote health and comfort.” — The Ministry of Healing, 368, 369

The equipment, accessories, and appliances you can acquire to facilitate work will be worth it, because this way you can teach your children to handle them and speed up activities.

E.g.: The electric rice cooker made my life much easier; today my 13-year-old son already knows how to prepare a complete meal, and the younger one, at 10, already prepares some dishes and helps me with meals.

“Cleanliness, neatness, and order are indispensable in the very administration of the family. But when the mother makes these things the all-important duties of her life, and devotes herself to them with neglect of the physical development and mental and moral cultivation of her children, she commits a lamentable error.” — The Signs of the Times, August 5, 1875.

May God help us to faithfully fulfill our mission...

Telma Valentim

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